In case you need a good laugh...

The only reason I am sharing this, is because we will probably be seeing many of you soon and my husband likes to retell the story. Each time he tells it he changes it to make it worse than it really was (although it was pretty bad to begin with!!)

We went to church on Christmas Eve. Caleb chowed down on garlic parmesan chips during the service, but I forgot to bring something for him to drink. By the time we were in the car, he was freaking out that he was "firsty." The only water we had in the car was frozen, but since this kid doesn't let up when he wants something, I decided to try and fill up the bottle with fresh water in the church. Since it was freezing out, Joel dropped me off by the front door.

When I came back out, I ran to where the van had been. It was so cold and windy, I quickly climbed into the blue van that I assumed was ours. (See where this is going! Why would I think that my lovely husband would move OUR van across the parking lot and think that I'd see him in the complete darkness??!!)

So I climbed in, shut the door, and turned around to give Caleb his water. Not even looking at my "husband" who was sitting in the drivers seat. At the same moment I saw an empty car seat, the man said "Opps! Wrong car!!"

Not knowing really what to do, I opened the door, jumped out, said "Merry Christmas!" and shut the door. Man, was I mortified! His wife and children were right behind me, probably wondering what in the heck I was doing! (I have never seen them before, so hopefully they were just visiting!) And then to top it off, I could not find our van ANYWHERE, so I had no where to hide!! And all the while, Joel and Caleb were laughing their heads off watching me try to find them. Nice huh?

Never a dull moment in the Land of Trisha!

From Our House to Yours...

YESSSS!!

Attempt #2...

I'm running out of time!!

At least one of them cooperated!


Side note: I thought Isaac's hives were gone, but they started popping up again last night and his back is covered again this AM. I'm waiting for our ped to call me back. Like I always say...never dull moment around here!

Attempt #1...

...to get a picture of the boys by a Christmas tree. We had the "present portion" of our Christmas with Joel's immediate family on Saturday. (His mom tends to go slightly overboard with gifts. She wanted the boys to open their gifts early this year so they aren't too "overwhelmed" on Christmas. Much to Joel's dismay, they will probably get just as many on Christmas too...we're looking like 'Toys R Us' around here already!)

Notice Caleb sticking his tongue out at me while Isaac is trying to escape. What are the chances I will get a good picture of them together by the tree this year?! (I shouldn't complain though because I think our Christmas card turned out pretty cute!)

Poor Baby!

This is what our little man's back looked like when I got in up from his nap yesterday. He was full of hives. A couple days ago, I gave him mandarin oranges for the first time. He woke up from his nap with a red rash (not like this one) all over his entire chest. I figured it was from the oranges, but I also looked at the stage 2 baby food I gave him for lunch and it contained egg whites. I know that you're not supposed to give a baby egg whites until they are one, so then I thought it was from eggs. However, I think I have already given him that flavor before and he didn't have a problem with it (but I doubt there is much egg in it anyway.)
Anyway, yesterday I gave him a broccoli/cheese baby food (which he loved) for lunch and this is the rash he had that afternoon. So then I was thinking he's allergic to broccoli or onion powder since they were also in stage 2 food he ate a couple days ago. So last night, I only gave him his oatmeal and sweet potatoes and he had his formula. This AM, he had the same welts as in the picture, but they were scattered around his back, arms and legs like mosquito bites.
Both times, it cleared right up with hydrocortisone cream and he was acting fine (except for his "party" in our bed from 1-3:30 this AM....wide awake, ready to go. I was so annoyed since I had just gotten home from work and was so tired. It never occurred to me that he was probably itching like crazy and couldn't sleep because he was covered in hives. Once again, sign me up for Mother of the Year...)
I was going to try and wait it out since I still thought it was from something he ate, until he woke up from his AM nap and his face was covered with welts. His left eye was almost swelled shut, so I called the peds office and off we went. The on call ped is sure that he's having a delayed allergic reaction to the Amoxicillin he was on for his ear infection. Even though the hives didn't show up until day 9 out of 10 of his course. He said that food allergies show up almost immediately after eating and will go away within a day. And since his keep "popping up" he thinks it's from the medication. (If it is a food allergy, he thinks it would be from the oranges and wants me to try them again later to make sure) He said that this med typically stays in the system for about 72 hours, so he should be better by tomorrow night. In the mean time we have to give him Benadryl around the clock to keep the hives away (which has been working, and thankfully he doesn't get "crazy hyper" from Benedryl like some kids do). I waited a little longer to give it to him tonight so he could have it right before bed and he started getting spots again...poor baby!
Hopefully he'll be in the clear after tomorrow and we can blame it on the med and not food. I am praying that is the case. I know how terrible food allergies can be!

10 months old

Where has time gone? I can't believe that Isaac is almost one! He's a boy on the move these days. He definitely doesn't have any fear (as evidenced by all the bruises on his forehead). He tries to make everything into a walker that he can push and walk behind (picnic table, clothes baskets, boxes, chairs, etc). He's getting really good at walking that way. I keep telling him he's not allowed to walk yet, but he's not listening to me! He loves to dance when music comes on and really gets his foot stomping. I'll have to video tape him one of these days and put it on here.
He's finally getting two teeth on the bottom, but they aren't next each other, unless he's going to have a huge gap. (Kinda weird...must be following in C's footsteps as he got all of his teeth out of order too!)
It seems like he went to bed one night and woke up with a head full of hair. It's crazy and has lots of cowlicks that make it go all different ways. And he still has that little "swoop" of hair across his forehead that looks like a curl. He's definitely going to be a "buzz cut" kid!
He's decided that he's too old for baby food, which has made it interesting. I sort of panicked because I am not use to a kid who likes to eat "regular stuff" and had no idea what to feed him. I was worried that he wasn't eating enough and that he's not getting enough nutrients. And I want him to develop good eating habits from the start. Thanks to the help from my family and friends, I have a bunch of things to try. They also reminded me that he's definitely not starving and has some reserve if he doesn't eat well all the time! He loves noodles, yo-baby yogurt, string cheese, carrots, mandarin oranges, and crackers.
I've been teaching him sign language and he knows "all done" and "more" and will sometimes do "eat" (if he's not too starved, then he just starts screaming!) He's really into giving kisses, which is so cute. And this week, he's started making growling sounds, which is hilarious. He is constantly trying to keep up with Caleb, longing for him to play with him. I keep telling him that one day Caleb will realize how cool it is to have someone to play with. He also tries to steal the food off of Caleb's plate when he's eating at his picnic table. At least it motivates C to eat faster! I have signed Isaac up for a baby class at the library and I am sure he's going to love it. He goes to Caleb's class right now and always tries to join in with the "big kids." Such a little ham!

More from Caleb

When Caleb is on timeout, Isaac gets very concerned about his screaming brother and always tries to go and keep him company. Caleb doesn't like this and yells, "No, I! Dis MY time out chair!"

When I tell him he has to eat something on his plate he's been saying "At-twee, my don't want it." (Actually I don't want it)

Instead of saying "I" when referring to himself, he says "my". For instance, when I ask him who's my big helper, he yells "My!" Or who wants to go outside? "My!!"

When Joel came home the other night, Caleb said very dramatically, "So happy dat you're home!"

When he's thinking, instead of saying "ummmm" he says "ummmbbb"

Birthday Recap...

I just realized that I didn't post pics from Caleb's birthday "parties."

We went to MN for Thanksgiving and since my parents were not going to be in WI for Caleb's birthday, they had a little party for him. He LOVED his John Deere cake and even got to see the "real deal!"




We did our annual sleigh ride with Santa and went out to eat afterwards. This year it was on Caleb's birthday and Grammie brought yummy cupcakes to celebrate.
Caleb's birthday falls on St Nick and is really close to Christmas. Last year, C was so overwhelmed with all of his gifts that we ended up putting a lot of them in the basement until the summer. So this year, we planned on just having his birthday party in June and celebrating 3.5 years instead. But, he couldn't stop talking about his party, kept changing his mind about the kind of cake he wanted and who he was going to invite, and was SO excited about his birthday. We decided to have a few of our friends and their kids over to celebrate so he could have his party. (We're still having the "big" one with our families in June.)

Isaac charming his ladies. He was going after the girls and trying to give them his open mouthed kisses!

Mallory and Caitlin
The "Boos coos" cake Caleb had to have. And Caleb with his buddies Maddy, Troy and Ayden

And no, he didn't eat any of his cakes this year either! He licked the frosting a little bit, but that was it. Oh well, more for me!!

Wordless Wednesday

Doctor Appointment

I took the boys to the pediatrician for their "well baby" appts today. Caleb had his 3 year check and Isaac had his 9 month check. I was going to cancel it because the weather is terrible here. (Rained all night, froze, rained this AM, and is now snowing so hard I can't see out the window. I think the whole city is shut down again...) But with Christmas coming up, I didn't want to reschedule, especially since I am already late with IZ's appt.

I am glad I took them because Isaac has an ear infection! He's been acting totally fine, except for last night he was a little more cranky than normal (meaning he cried when I put him into his crib instead of falling right to sleep and this AM was a bit clingy). I didn't think anything of it since he's FINALLY getting a tooth, well actually 3 all at the same time and blamed his mood on that. Anyway, I mentioned to the doc that he started pulling at his ear this morning and was a bit fussy. (Since Caleb is always on antibiotics, he has never had an ear infection, so I really didn't know if I should be concerned with Isaac's "symptoms.") He assured me that that kids typically do that when they are teething. But, when he looked in his ear he found a pretty bad infection. I felt terrible. So he's on 10 days worth of antibiotics, which he hates.

The good news is, aside from his ear, he's doing fabulous. He's 24 pounds, 4 oz and is 30 inches tall. (90th percentile, and 97th percentile) His development is on track and his doc has no concerns about him. I told him that he's getting tired of baby food and really wants to eat what we are, and he told me that I can give him anything he wants (except for fish, peanuts and honey)! Yesterday he ate an entire stick of string cheese for his snack! He loves to feed himself crackers and fruit. His ped also wants to see him off of bottles completely by the time he's a year old. Wow. Lucky for me, Isaac doesn't like to drink his bottles unless he's sleepy (sound familiar??!!), but he will drink from a sippy cup during meals. I am just going to have to start pushing the cup more I guess. Anyway, his "turn" was very short and sweet.

So Grammie and I swapped kids and it was Caleb's turn. His wasn't as short, but his ped was also very happy with Caleb's progress as well. He (of course) is concerned about his night time waking, which is back to at least 6 times a night. He really wants us to take him to the sleep clinic, but Joel is against it, so we won't be doing it at this point. I don't want to subject him to anything else either, but I am not sure how long I can keep getting up so often and still be able to function during the day. I have been reading the book "The Out of Sync Child" and it says that children with sensory issues are typically terrible sleepers and one cause (among a lot of other factors) can be due to a diet that lacks magnesium. For a child who basically lives on noodles, this could be a factor. His ped wasn't too convinced, but did give me guidelines as to how much magnesium he needs. His vitamin only provides about 5% of what he needs, but whole milk contains some too. Side note: I also read that a diet the lacks zinc can affect a child's taste, so food doesn't taste good...interesting! Caleb's always preferred very strong flavors. For instance, yesterday was licking up nacho cheese sauce from Joel's plate, which is way too spicy for me! And he loves lemon and pickle juice. I also read that Omega-3 fats are also very important for children with sensory issues as well (I knew it was good for speech development from my preemie mom friends). I am going to do my own research and see if I should start giving him supplements. I figure it won't hurt to try! Although I can hear Joel already "He's on enough crap already!!" Anyway, he wrote out a "schedule" on how to get Caleb off of the night time bottles, so when I get up enough stamina to be up all night for at least a week, I will be trying it:)

I brought along C's school testing scores and he said he's mostly concerned about his speech at this point. He feels that C's fine and gross motor stuff will come, but really wants me to get him into gymnastics, soccer or any other sports that he can participate in at this age. He also concerned about his social development, and wants me to take him to "anything and everything" to get him around kids his age. He told me about a couple places in the area that I had never heard of, like a huge warehouse that has playgrounds in it so kids can play during the winter months...sounds like fun!

He was pleased with his growth (weight 26 pounds, 4 oz and height 34.5 inches..which put him at the 5th percentile for weight and 10th for height!). When I explained to him that I still have to feed him in order for him to eat anything, and he told he that I can start letting him feed himself and see how much he'll eat. I'm guessing it won't be much, but we'll see. He also wants him to eat fruits and vegetables (Well, duh!! Maybe he could come over and try and get him to eat them!). Anyway, it should be interesting.

Once again, C charmed some of the nurses that we've known since he was DC'd from the NICU. A couple didn't even recognize him! They cannot believe that he's getting so big and is so active. Some of them haven't seen him in a long time and they couldn't stop talking about how cute he is!

So, other than Isaac's poor ear, it was a good appt. He has to go back in 3 weeks for an ear re-check and his 9 month vaccines. And C doesn't have to go back until he's 4!! (Let's hope that is the case!)

Who says he's not growing fast enough?

1st Birthday (So precious!)

2nd Birthday (What in the heck are you doing mom?!)

3rd Birthday (I am not going to smile! What? You're going to take away my brand new "witar" if I don't "mile"? Fine! Just don't take away my all time favorite present! And will you please play the "na-na-na" song (Pink's "So What") so I can jam when you're done?!)

Happy Birthday Caleb!!!!

Dear Caleb,

I cannot believe that my little buddy is going to be 3 tomorrow! You are growing up way too fast. It seems like just yesterday I was begging you to hold on and keep fighting....look at you now! You are definitely our little miracle.

You have made so many strides with your development this year. Everyday you are learning to do something new. Even in this past week, you are talking more and more, even saying some sentences. Maybe you ARE ready to be a "model" for your speech class! You always want to prove me wrong! (Although please don't teach the other kids the word you've been saying all day today that starts with F and rhymes with duck. I am not sure where you heard that one, but you clearly know it's naughty...you are such a little stinker!)

You are becoming more sure of yourself everyday, and even danced with the other kids at your library class this week. You even showed them your "booty shake!" This is the first time that you have joined in with the group and you made me so proud. Actually, I am proud of everything you do. I never dreamed that you'd be doing all of these amazing things. You are clearly trying to ditch the "preemie label." I promise that I will try and let go of the past too.

I am also very proud of you for becoming a great big brother. I know that "I-Hoppy" came and disrupted your life, but you are starting to realize that he's not so bad after all. Even though you don't always show it, I know that you are very concerned about him and care about him very much. That makes me so happy. One day you guys are going to be best friends. (Either that, or Isaac will probably squash you and force you to be friends with him!)

Happy Birthday, Caleb! We love you so much!

Love,
Mommy

(If you haven't noticed by now, my computer-savvy self (yah right) figured out how to put songs on here. I picked a couple that remind me of Caleb.)

Turning Three...

There's a saying out there that preemies "catch up" by the time they turn two years old. We know this is a ridiculous myth. Birth to 3 gives children an extra year to "get it together," but once they turn 3, they can no longer be in the program. Caleb has been in the Birth to 3 program since he was discharged from the hospital (3 months old). He began PT/OT when he was 5 months old (They would have started earlier, but I wanted to wait until the RSV season was over). They have been the source of all of his therapies. (Except for his original speech therapies and the feeding clinic) He had his "transition" testing done with the local school district a few weeks ago. I still cannot believe he's turning three this week....YIKES!!

Warning: This post will most likely be very boring to most of you. If you don't want the long-winded version, just skip to "The results" at the end of all of this :)

A social worker came to our house for the initial eval. He tested Caleb with the Vineland II Adaptive Behavior Scale. It took nearly 2 hours and Caleb was about ready to throw this guy out the window towards the end. He was 35.5 months old when he did the tests. Here's how he did:
He's at a 35 month level for receptive language (how well he understands and can follow directions)
29 month level for expressive language (how well he talks)
14-29 month level for daily living skills (dressing, eating, bathing, etc)
23 month level for gross motor
24 month level for fine motor (he did this one last and Caleb was throwing blocks by that point, so I don't think this was too accurate).
So after seeing and meeting Caleb, this guy said that Caleb would "certainly qualify for special education preschool." I was a bit bummed, since I thought (aside from his speech and eating) that he's doing really well and never imagined that he'd qualify, so it sort of hit me hard. But, after thinking about it, I realized that it's not as bad as I was making it out to be. All of the teachers and therapists would know his weaknesses and could help him build on his strengths. If I sent him to a "regular" preschool, would they be as attentive to these things? I am not sure.

After I was feeling "okay" with the whole idea, I had to take him to the school so he could get officially tested by each specialty. He did SO good. He was doing things for them that I had no idea he could do (or things I have tried to get him to do and he never could/would....like draw a perfect circle, copy a line, stack 10 blocks, and cut, almost correctly, with a scissors!) Here's how he did:

Physical therapy:
"He has low muscle tone, with slightly sluggish protective responses and equilibrium reactions. However, he has excellent ball skills."
38 month level for object manipulation (ball skills...Joel was proud!)
25 month level for locomotion (walking, running, jumping, etc.) She noted that he cannot skip or gallop, cannot go up or down stairs correctly, exhibits signs of gravitational insecurity, is reluctant to jump, and has a flat footed gait with little trunk rotation and decreased arm swing while running...nothing like picking him apart, huh?!
However, this is not enough of a delay to qualify for PT because they average the 2 scores. I find it very "funny" that throwing/kicking a ball gets the same amount of "points" as being able to run/jump correctly! Yes, it makes his daddy proud that he is "advanced" in the ball skills area, but in my opinion it's probably a bit more important to be able to go up and down steps!

Occupational therapy:
Pre-writing skills: 33-34 month level
Cutting skills: 25 month level
Visual Perceptual skills: 30 month level
Manual dexterity: 28 month level
Sensory functioning/concerns: Auditory (responds negatively to loud or unexpected noises), Oral Sensory Processing (puts everything (but food!) in his mouth), Endurance/tone (weak grasp), Modulation related to body position (hesitates going up and down stairs), and Emotional/social responses (cries easily, outbursts for unsuccessful tasks, stubborn)
So he also didn't qualify for OT either. They did recommend the book, "The Out of Sync Child." Which I checked out from the library and it's about Sensory Processing Disorder. They didn't tell me that's what it was about, but they were pretty insistent that I read it. So now I am confused...is this what they think he has?! I guess I have more questions for them now!

Special ed teacher:
She was very impressed with how smart Mr C is. She said his pre-academic skills are intact and he demonstrated at an appropriate level for his age. She's a bit concerned about his over-shyness and lack of social skills, but is confident that these things will come once he's more exposed to children his age and social groups (library group, preschool, etc.)

Speech therapy:
Since I feel this area is his biggest weakness, I was glad to finally have someone test him who doesn't know him. That way, I would have a better idea of how he's doing. Well, the woman who tested him was in a big rush because she was leaving on a field trip. She did the auditory comprehension(receptive speech) test first. I told her that he never has had a delay with this. He did really well, but it didn't require a lot of talking, mostly pointing. She then decided it was time for her to go and said she'd do the articulation part of the testing "later."
When I went to the meeting to discuss Caleb's results, she put on her report that she could understand him "80% of the time," so the articulation part of the test was not needed. WHAT??!! I cannot understand him most of the time unless I know what he's doing and even then I have a hard time. I cannot understand him when I talk to him on the phone.

THE RESULTS!!! (Finally, right?!)
So obviously he didn't qualify for any therapy or special ed preschool after all. He needed to have a 30% delay in an area, which apparently he doesn't. (Which is surprising since he's almost a year behind in many of the areas) I am still not convinced about the speech part, and was ready to put up a fight to keep him in speech therapy, especially since I don't feel that she really tested him completely. However, they told me that they'd like him to participate in their new "speech class" which sounds like it will be similar to the speech therapy class he's currently in. It will be 1.5 hours on Fridays starting in January. There will be 6 "speech impaired" kids and 4 "models," along with a teacher and speech therapist. They want Caleb to be a "model." I laughed out loud because I thought they were joking! How can a kid who barely talks, and when he does is pretty hard to understand be a model?! Of course I am thrilled that they want him to be in it, but I have a feeling they might recant their offer once he's there. If nothing else, a different ST (not the one who tested him) will be able to see/hear how he does and I will ask her if she feels he needs to be retested.

PT recommended that I sign him up for gymnastics to work on his balance and body awareness and swimming to work on building his muscles. She doesn't feel that private PT is necessary since those activities will be just as good for him at this point. (She explained that he will always have low muscle tone, there's nothing we can do about that. But, we can work on strengthening his muscles and his balance so that he's able to compensate.)

OT recommended to continue working with him on fine motor skills at home (correct positioning of a pencil, cutting straight lines, stringing beads, and simple block designs. And to also work on improving sensory functioning by having him preform movement activities such as swinging, jumping and crawling/hands and feet (animal) walking. They also recommended the book "The Out of Sync Child has fun." Okay, now they really have me worried about SPD!!

So, as you can see our Big-little man is doing excellent! I will admit that it's hard to see his delays on paper. But all I have to do is think back to the day in the NICU when his neonatologist mentioned the words "cerebral palsy" to me, and I thank God that these are the only "delays" he has!

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!

I have SO MUCH to be thankful for!!

I am thankful for my wonderful husband.  He works hard so that I can stay home with our babies.  He's a great father and the boys adore him.  I am thankful for our loving families and friends.  There is no way to repay them for all that they've done for us!

I am thankful for wet, slobbery kisses...

...and I am so thankful for our beautiful boys.

We are blessed. God is GOOD!

(Of course I am thankful for so much more, but this has to be quick because I have two little trouble makers getting into EVERYTHING at their Bedstemor and Papa's un-childproofed house.  Like I said, God is good!)

Definitely NOT ready for this...

This is what we woke up to this AM....
We got our first "real" snow last night. Caleb was SO excited. He looked outside this morning and yelled "Wook at dat! Sooo winta oweside today!" (look at that, so winter outside today!)

I miss these days already.....


Caleb update: I think he's finally on the upswing from the nasty bug. No vomiting since Saturday and no diarrhea since yesterday afternoon. Keep your fingers crossed. It's been a miserable week for him. And also send positive thoughts that he'll start eating solids again. I have a feeling it's not gonna be pretty since we've let him have bottles all week!

Sick

I've been a bit more venturesome with taking the boys to the store together when we need something. Of course I always use bleach wipes all over the cart before I put them in it and make sure I Purell their hands before we get into the car. Well, now I think Caleb is paying for it. (Although he could have gotten it at speech therapy or at his preschool testing last week I guess.) Anyway, he's been sick since Sunday. He has some sort of stomach virus that's really taking its tole on him. He hasn't really had anything solid to eat since Sunday and I can tell this is going to be a huge setback in the eating department. All he wants is his "bobbys" (bottles). I put him on the scale today and he's already lost over a pound (which I know is mostly water weight and he'll gain it back, but still...) He's never been a great drinker, so it's been exhausting trying to make sure he stays hydrated.

I thought he was turning the corner, but this afternoon/evening he's been on the toilet about every hour again. I have been amazed that he hasn't regressed with potty training since his diarrhea is so bad. He hasn't had one accident yet. He even got up 5 times during the night screaming he had to go "potty." And to top it off, he's vomited several times as well. Poor guy.
Joel has it too and he said he's never felt this sick before and actually stayed home all week because of it. (This is a guy who didn't miss a day of work last year due to an illness, so I know it must really be bad.) If it's that bad for him, I cannot imagine how terrible Caleb feels.

I spoke with his pediatrician and he said that as long as he pees at least every 4-6 hours, that's good enough to keep him out of the hospital. This is the number one thing they are seeing in the office lately and he really doesn't want C admitted if we can avoid it. He also said it's been lasting at least a week. Great. It breaks my heart to see him so miserable. He keeps telling us, "Cawub no feel good." "No feel betta" (better)

It seems like Isaac can sense that C doesn't feel good because he can't seem to leave him alone. Everywhere Caleb is, Isaac wants to be and he pulls himself up so he can be closer to him. He was bringing Caleb toy after toy today...it was so sweet. Of course C was just throwing them back at him though. I don't know how many times I've heard "No, I!" and "No I hoppy!" I am praying that Isaac and I do not get it too.

And even though he's sick, he's still coming up with some cute things....
I lit a candle in the bathroom because I seriously could not go in there without feeling sick myself (Joel is gonna love me for putting that on here!) When I took C to the bathroom, he said to me "Mmmmm, mells wondaful in he-a" (smells wonderful in here!)

I usually shop at Target, but Walmart was on my way home the other day so I stopped there and got diapers. When I got home, C asked me if I got them at the "circle store" and I told him I got them at Walmart. When Joel was getting him ready for bed the other night I heard C telling him, "Mom dot diapa's at Walmawt, no at circle store, no at Menawds" (Mom got diapers at Walmart, not circle store, not at Menards) Joel said "Really?" And Caleb replied "Diapa's fum Walmawt, tools fum Menards" (Diapers from Walmart, tools from Menards.) I don't know where he gets this stuff!

He looked at me today (wearing sweat pants, a sweat shirt and my hair up..totally NOT looking my best) and said, "Mom woo so pwetty." (You so pretty) If that isn't enough to melt my heart!

9 months old...

Isaac's new obsession is Caleb's Cozy Coupe. He wants to be in it ALL DAY LONG. If I take him out, and "hide" it, he'll start searching for it. He loves to stand up and try to push it around, although that has been the reason for most of the bruises on his head lately. And he REALLY likes it when we put him in it and push him around the house. The other day when I was making supper, he was moving it around the kitchen and I wasn't really paying too much attention to him. All of a sudden I heard him yelling. I turned around, and saw just his legs coming out the window! He must have thought he could climb in by himself (without opening the door) and fell in! He doesn't think he's a baby anymore:(

Blessed

This weekend we were once again reminded how blessed we really are. Yes, we have been 'through the ringer' with Caleb, but he's HERE with us. We are so blessed that we have two amazing little boys that we can hold, cuddle, and smooch anytime we want to. I cannot imagine our life without them.

One of my friends from high school and her husband welcomed a new baby, Ethan, into the world on November 8th. He was born with a congenital diaphragmatic hernia, which is a very rare birth defect but can usually be surgically fixed. Ethan was doing really well and amazing the nurses and doctors with his progress. He passed away yesterday afternoon after suffering from a severe bleed in his brain. Please keep Janell, Matt and their families in your prayers as they deal with the loss of their precious baby boy.

John Deere Boys

Caleb is on the verge of needing professional help for his addiction to John Deere tractors. That's pretty much all he wants to play with these days. One good thing about them is that he'll play by himself for at least 10 minutes before he needs to be entertained. And even though he has at least 10 of them, he throws a fit when I make him share one with Isaac. Isaac will "drive" them across the floor, crawling with one hand on the tractor and the other on the ground, making truck sounds as he goes along. How in the heck does he know how to do that already? He's already ditched his baby toys for big boy toys :(

Caleb has also started to insist that he picks out Isaac's clothes in the AM. He always wants him to wear his JD onesie and will empty an entire drawer of clothes onto the floor looking for it. C has quite a few 12-18 month JD tops that are getting snug (well, too short anyway) for him and I have been trying to convince him that he should give them to Isaac. As you can imagine, he's not buying it. He tells me "See, it fits" in his fake high-pitched voice.

Prematurity Sucks, Part 2

Well, it's November again and that means it's Prematurity Awareness Month. I feel, (since no one ever told me) that it's part of my "duty" to make people aware of the impact of premature births. I never in a million years would have thought we'd have a premature baby. I never knew it could happen to anyone.

Some people may want to say to me, "Caleb is all caught up and doing fine, so drop the prematurity issue will ya?!" Nope. I can't. Yes, he's doing fantastic at the moment. Really thriving actually, especially in the past 6 months. But if you saw his chest x-rays this week, you'd see that his lungs remain severely damaged from being premature. If you would come to our house to eat, you'd see that his eating is far from normal. He probably wouldn't have eating issues and we wouldn't have to be so obsessed with what/how much he eats, he probably wouldn't have needed physical therapy, occupational therapy, or speech therapy, he wouldn't have to be evaluated for "special education" preschool, maybe he wouldn't be so shy and unsure of himself in groups of his peers, he probably wouldn't be so sensitive to different sounds, he probably wouldn't have "low muscle tone" as I was told this week, he wouldn't need eye exams every year, maybe he'd like to sleep. I know these things are "minor" compared to the things that other kids who were premature are dealing with, and heck I know I should just be happy that he's here as I know too many people who have lost their child/ren. They'd be elated to have a child like Caleb. Believe me, I know how blessed we are that he's here and doing so well. I thank God everyday for letting us keep our little miracle. My point is, he most likely wouldn't be dealing with this stuff if he had been full term. I feel guilty about it pretty much every day, even though I am told time after time that it wasn't my fault.

Today, Caleb got out his first picture album and he saw pics of himself on the vent for the first time. After I told him the pics were of him, he had tears in his eyes and said "Cawub so sick. Cawub soooo sad." Which of course broke my heart. How do you explain prematurity to an almost 3 year old?

And now that we have a baby who was full term, it's almost like rubbing salt in a wound. Of course we also thank God for Isaac every day. (Again, I know there are people who will never experience having a full term baby. I know how extremely blessed we are!) He's brought so much into our lives in his 8 short months with us. He's a complete joy and I cannot imagine life without our 2nd little miracle. But, watching him develop and do things without struggling or needing help really makes me feel worse about what Caleb has had to endure. When it took Caleb forever to meet milestones, that was our "normal" since we didn't have another child to compare him to. Now we see Isaac hitting his milestones on time and even early with some things and it just brings back how hard these things were for C. Simple things like seeing Isaac babble all day long (Caleb never did this), loving to eat (obviously...he almost weighs more than Caleb already!) or seeing him wake up in the AM and from every nap smiling, laughing, and playing in his crib (Caleb wakes up screaming and upset) just reminds us how much prematurity sucks. Yes, Caleb is/will probably be stronger because he's had to overcome so much and he's who he is because he was premature, blah, blah, blah. I know that. And if I didn't, people tell me that all the time. Yes, prematurity made him who he is today, but I can't help but wonder what he would have been like if he hadn't been so early.

Caleb has a new little boy in his speech class who is a foster child. He was also premature, so his foster mother and I have a lot to talk about. This woman is amazing. She and her husband currently have 4 foster kids, all who were premature. One was born at 22 weeks, and has pretty severe issues from being so early. They are planning on adopting all of them. She told me that when she went to pick up one of the babies from the NICU, there was 6 babies who were ready to be discharged, but they didn't have anyone to take them home. That makes me so sad. If these babies would have been born full term, would they have been left alone at the hospital? I doubt it. Even if their mother didn't want them, I am sure there would have been adoptive families lining up for them.

And just so this post isn't just a pity party for Trisha, I'd like to share a few positives that are a result of all of this. We were brought closer to God and shown how amazing the power of prayer really is. We have met so many wonderful people on this journey. The people who took care of him in the NICU became our family, as did a couple families that also had babies there. We still are in contact with several of them, and honestly we couldn't have gotten through the NICU experience without these amazing people (and our family and friends, of course). And I have met several "preemie mom's" in a support group I belong to. I consider them my friends and without them, I would have surely gone insane by now! They totally "get" what we have/are going through. We no longer take life for granted. Before C, we were young, carefree and really didn't seem to have much of a worry in the world. We had to grow up fast. Caleb has really helped us put things into perspective and showed us what our priorities really are. His will to live has been inspiring to us and all those who know him. I remember sitting in my hospital room and the neonatologist came in and told us that C was very sick and would probably not survive....that they were going to try "one more thing"... if that didn't work, they had done everything they could for him. Look where he is today! He sure proved everyone wrong! He has such a zest for life, and really is oblivious to all the things he's gone through. And have I ever mentioned how funny this kid is?! We don't know what the future holds for Caleb, but I believe that God has great plans for our little boy.

Statistics show that over 1,400 babies are born prematurely everyday. Please support the March of Dimes as they continue to try and find a "cure" for prematurity.

Wordless Wednesday

Halloween, Take 2

We had a great time at the Herda's annual Halloween party. Caleb even went trick or treating this year. The weather was perfect. Their subdivision goes all out for Halloween with costumes, lights, sound effects, etc. There was lots of people in masks giving out candy and I thought for sure Caleb would be too scared to do it. After the first house, I assured him that people were just wearing costumes and it wasn't scary, just pretend. So every house he went to, he would say "Dus a mast(just a mask), momma. Not cary. Cawub not cared." Kind of like he was trying to convince himself he was okay. He was also very polite saying "TANKS." to everyone who gave him a treat. Isaac rode in the wagon with his friend, Dominick, for a while, but he wasn't too impressed and started throwing a fit, so I took him back to the house after a little bit.

I am probably one of the only parents in the world who wishes their kid would eat candy! It has tons of calories! ("Empty" calories, of course. But when your kid has eating issues, you'll take any kind of calories you can get into them!)Caleb has no interest in it at all. Of course that means I have been eating it, pretty much non stop. So much for the 10 pounds I still need to lose from having Isaac!

My group shots didn't turn out, so I am hoping one of our friends will send me a couple...hint hint Rhi, Shaun, anyone... It was a house full of kids, and so much fun. (I think there was 12 kids under the age of 4!) The kids are getting so big and growing up too fast! Here are a couple pics I took before we went to the party.

And I have to write this down or I will forget. I had to work today and while I was gone, Caleb told Joel someone was at the door. When Joel asked him who was here, he replied "Deff." (Jeff) We know quite a few Jeff's, so Joel said "Jeff who?" Without skipping a beat Caleb replied, "Deff Suppan." (Brewers pitcher) I don't know where the kid gets this stuff!

Happy Halloween!

Here are a couple pics of the boys in their costumes on Tuesday for Caleb's speech therapy party. Can you tell Caleb is sick of getting his pictures taken? Once again this year (like last year) Caleb was refusing to wear a costume. Thank goodness for Gymboree and their "themed" clothing lines. At first he was refusing to wear this, but I have convinced him "it's just clothes and not a costume!" He does like the hat though. Isaac wore Caleb's pumpkin costume from last year for C's party, but will (hopefully) be a duck tonight. More pics to come!